To overcome anxiety in social situations, you must stop using avoidance or safety behaviors (such as scrolling on your phone, mentally rehearsing your sentences, or isolating yourself) and intentionally shift your attention toward others by setting an external goal to work through the discomfort and develop your confidence.

noli's read

This advice is based on proven behavioral strategies for managing discomfort in social interactions. Moving away from 'safety behaviors' is supported by solid scientific evidence, including numerous meta-analyses confirming the efficacy of behavioral approaches in reducing anxiety. A randomized controlled trial (RCT) published in the journal Behaviour Research and Therapy demonstrates that these protective rituals, while reassuring in the short term, act as barriers that sustain the fear of being judged. Furthermore, a clinical trial published in PMC confirms that reorienting one's attention outward (rather than focusing on one's own doubts) is a key mechanism for developing social ease. A recent 2025 randomized controlled trial published by Elsevier provides an interesting nuance: reducing these avoidance behaviors alone works better if one engages in frequent exposure and is confident in the method. Overall, gradually exposing oneself to discomfort remains the most robust approach in modern research for rebuilding self-confidence.

the sources

No named source held this one up — that absence is part of the verdict.